Im just putting it out there that I am not in the mood to talk. I discovered this last night when I went to my community group/Bible study. I was so tired of listening to people ramble on and on that I wanted to scream or choke something (Im just being honest). I have noticed lately, and I have been told by others, that I am an easy person to talk to. And I have noticed in the past that I can effortlessly get virtual strangers to unleash all their "issues" on me...even people I meet once and may never meet again. However, following the circumstances of how this week started out, I am no longer emotionally capable of listening to anyone. I do still continue to put on a "front" and smile and socialize with parents at school, co-workers, neighbors and friends but I am running on a thin shred of patience. I do not like being this bitter...I just want to return to my old self, when I only had three problems to think about and not five (I've got a prayer list taped to my monitor). So, anyways, I will hopefully get there. Until then, I do not want to talk, my glass is empty. I want to just focus on shallow joys such as watching a movie and temporarily forget about the bigger issues looming. Of course, I will call you back soon, because that is how I am, just not now.
On another note, why is it when you try to avoid your problems, little reminders rise out of the woodwork? Guess what the front page of MSN is today? Its called "Would you Recognize a Heart Attack?" and of course I read it and now I am even more freaked out. Then today my little brainiac, all on his own, comes up to me and shows me a diagram of a heart he found in a book and proceeds to lecture me about all of its components. Of course, I can't get mad at him because he is so dang smart and cute, but GEEZ!!!
Okay, well that is all. My friend is coming over now to watch a movie with me. Sounds wonderful! And I apologize once again for this blog.
skip to main |
skip to sidebar
3 comments:
This will all be resolved. It will all get better. It's just a matter of time...the waiting is worse than the knowing.
And don't let your imagination get out of control.
Cheer up! Trust me, you are not at rock bottom. There are hard times that everyone must go through in life and it could be a lot worse. Also, it feels like it sucks now, but you will get through it. Its best to stay positive--try to laugh about your problems even. Don't let them get the better of you. In a few months, you will have a completely different perspective on these problems (i.e. that wasn't too bad, or I worried too much, or I'm so glad we got through it) Its all a learning experience too--with health issues, its best not to worry until there is something to really worry about (don't let your imagination get out of control) Worry when the doctor says you need a heart replacement. Taxes are taxes, its just money. You can take care of this problem easy, just by tackling it: Earn it, save it, pay it off and next year figure out how to avoid the problem. DON'T LET THESE THINGS BRING YOU DOWN!!Cheer up!!
The social worker in me kicked in when you talked about people always unloading on you. When I worked in the social work field (maybe I still do?), I learned the importance of having PERSONAL BOUNDARIES! That means you decide how close you're going to let other people get to you, how much your going to deal with, and YOU have to decide where to draw the line. Having personal boundaries has always helped me, especially when I lived at Forward Stride in Wilsonville. So pick your boundaries and rely on them!
Post a Comment