Sorry Dad and Mom, I did not get pictures of you both at the airshow. But the pictures probably would have looked as goofy as all the others!

Year 3, Day 1.

Today was my first day of teacher inservice before the kids arrive next week. This will be my third year, and my second time with this group of students (I had the majority in first grade).

As much as I didn't want the summer to end, and at times (especially by the end of the year) I would really like a less-involved, higher paying job, I really feel safe and secure at this school...like I belong her. And though that committment is scary, I just take it a year at a time and somehow I am already here at year three.

I think I feel safe here because people know my recent past and are very understanding. The summer provided me a chance to get away from all the questions and day to day demands of school and have some personal reflection time. In the process I would definately say I have become more emotionally unsteady as things began to finally really sink in.

That is why I am glad I came back today. Because I can avoid my feelings for another year while I focus on being a teacher to 21 now-third graders. But if I ever do want to talk (just not right now) I know I have a community of listeners and supporters and prayers. In the meantime, my standby answer if you ask will be "Im doing great!".

And by the way, next summer I plan to sleep! I have never felt more tired coming back to school than I did today!

Lately...

It seems my head has been in a swirl lately- like I am quickly circling around the toilet bowl and am ready to take the plunge. Yep. Summer is over and school is here once again. And with that comes my busiest time of the year- nervously wrapping up odds and ends at home while setting up a classroom and planning academics (and this year its a whole new grade). I fully enjoyed the first half of summer and we had some great trips- now, I have no clue where the second half of summer went and we have had some botched attempts at fun trips. Maybe going back to school is a good decision?

Last week I wrapped up my summer nanny job and tutoring jobs as well. I also got in a dr. appt for some swelling cankles (the pics are for my sisters who can relate)and a dentist appt for an achy tooth (whoever heard of exposed roots?! My teeth are healthy as can be but for some reason a tooth in the back does not like exposure to cold food and apparently there is no way to fix it). I got a little shopping down but limited myself due to my varying size and income.

My biggest and saddest and most anticipated achievement last week was selling my beloved car La Fonda (the Honda). She was a sweet ride but way too much for me and what I was willing to pay. I tightened my purse straps but she hung on for six months until the right people came along (but it was the worst possible timing for us). I miss her (and my fabulous key fab with power door locks, which I choked up over when I handed them off) but if I save right, I can one day have another like her (minus the car payments). We had La Fonda for exactly 27 months to the day, and drove her for exactly 27,000 miles (from off the car lot to the parking garage of the bank). My sister called when I was signing the papers to buy her (my first ever solo car buying experience) and my other sister called when I was signing her off to her new owners.

Awww, life is full of ironies. We had a trip planned next weekend to Wildlife Safari in Winston, Oregon and then we were going to head over to Diamond and Crater Lake. The one time I tried going to Wildlife Safari was with my family and I came down with a case of pneumonia and we had to return home...it was a special surprise trip by my parents, which made it all the more sad. Now we have to cancel once again due to the fact that we have no road-trip ready vehicles at the moment. Maybe one day we will get to go...we were looking forward to now because it was to be our final moment of summer and our first time vacationing alone together of the summer.Oh well- maybe next year.

We did get to try something new last night that we had never done before but I had always wanted to: We went to a drive-in movie theater! At one time there were over 4000 across America, and now there are only around 400. This particular one kept true to tradition and played old concession stand commercials, played the national anthem before the movies started and advised going to church. It was a fun time!

Today was the best part of the weekend: We got to take Dad on his birthday trip to the Oregon International Airshow. We had great parking, great seats and overall great weather, though it got a little hot toward the end. We saw awesome flight and aerobatic maneuvers and we got to see a fire breathing Robo-Saurus "eat" some cars. We spent all day there though the time flew by because it was so fun!

I had a ton of stuff to do tonight in anticipation for tomorrow but only a fraction got done. I cannot wait until we are into the new routine of things at school and at home. Though I am sad summer is over, I absolutely love fall and watching the progression of the season is what I am looking forward to most. Lately I have been wistful for the "lazy days" of college and strolling around campus in the fall- riding our bikes everywhere, living in the dorms, playing outside, eating brunch in a small local cafe...all things we can do here (except live in a dorm) but there was something especially more pleasant about doing it at OSU. Maybe because college was not yet real, real life...and there wasn't so much to always be doing!

Happy Birthday Dads!

Happy Birthday to both of our Dads, who will be celebrating their big days within a few days of each other. We had a good time tonight with pizza and fun. It feels like we were just all together for Father's Day- my how the summer has flown! Happy Birthday to my sister Heather too...we are sorry you could not make it! Your card is coming in the mail! :-)

History of Dumb Questions

My cell phone broke this week so I go out of my way to take it to the store and explain that the power button will not work. The first question the lady asks me is "Did you hold the power button down?". Seriously? Why do you think that would not have crossed my mind?

Then today, I explained to the guy I babysit for that the sound on the baby monitor no longer works (hasn't all week) and he said "Really? Did you turn the volume up?". Ohhhh! No! I didn't- Maybe I should try that?!!

Do I have "Stupid" written on my forehead or something? I think if I came to you with a valid complaint/suggestion, I would have tried all my other options first. Yes?

Ay ya ya.

Pray Pray Pray!

thejungleer.blogspot.com

This is the blog address of Brad and Brandon's infantry in Iraq... It seems Brandon is a part of the unit that was attacked this week by a roadside bomb but Brandon was not along on the ride. Praise God but we still need to keep praying... for all the soldiers!

The worst attempted camping trip ever... but it turned out fun in the end....

On Friday night five rebel rousers (Bryan, me, my friend Melissa and her two sons) left Portland in pursuit of a fun camping trip on the coast. Little did we know we were in for a big adventure!

Late Friday night, we pulled into the only place I could get a reservation (this reservation was made in July, nearly a full month ahead of time. Side note: book reservations early): S***** Beach RV Park and Resort. At first we laughed so hard when we saw it...it was a TRAILER PARK! Ughhhh....Like the worst kind you could imagine with the shadiest/seediest people milling about run-down rvs. Our "campsite" was a piece of grass by the road. Remember: RV does not ALWAYS mean vehicles used purely for recreation. And stay away from anything advertising "Park" and "Resort" in the same sentence.

So when we told her (the butch, racist lady who I spoke with on the phone...should have been my first clue) that we were thinking about looking for another campground because we were under the wrong impression, she got all pissed and told us she would charge my credit card for a higher rate than initially agreed upon and give our site to the next campers who came in if we left. She let us know that there were no other spots to be had in any nearby campgrounds. We told her it would be wrong for her to charge our card without giving us enough time to figure it out...blah blah blah...Basically we did not feel safe, it was not the campground experience we were looking for, and we did not want to support her poor business practices at an exorberant rate. I unleashed my fury upon her and it turned into a big shouting match between her and I (Bryan occasionally interjected but he was waiting for a boxing match to begin) and she eventually kicked us off her property and threatened to call the cops!!! However, she was "kind" enough to say she would not charge us.

And unfortunately, she wasn't lying about there being no other spots along the coast for camping. I can't believe how many people go camping at the beach in the summer (lots of people from Washington especially)! We even tried to get a motel room to no avail. So at 11:00 at night we eventually were allowed to pitch a tent by the overflow parking lot at Nehalem Bay State Park! I love that place...my family has been camping there several times and there is always so much to do. They were so nice and understanding...we paid only $8 for a permit and set up our tent and chairs. We sat around our lantern (no fires allowed)and laughed about the day. We woke up the next morning and went over to the day use area to make breakfast and smores on the fire pit and picnic table. I promptly called my bank at opening to cancel my credit card. Knowing a person like that had all my information made me extremely nervous. We were initially going to return to the campground in hopes that someone cancelled their reservations for Saturday night, but we all mutually decided we had had enough fun for one weekend and came home Saturday night after a fun day on the beach!

All in all it turned out just dandy (and cheaper than planned), but in retrospect its a pretty funny story. I decided I will never make another reservation for camping anywhere except for a State Park, unless someone has been there before and can vouch for its cleanliness and safety. I will no longer google any random campgrounds for fear of misleading information. This is all in the rare case that Bryan will ever agree to go camping again...

My Week "Off"

This past week I had a rare opportunity to engage in activities by myself. Both the baby that I nanny and the kids that I tutor were off on family vacations so I had a *whole* five days to do what I wanted- but it ended up being what I needed to do to get ready for the upcoming school year and other various things I procrastinated on. Needless to say, the five days went by in a dizzying tailspin and I am wishing I had another week off. Oh well- there is always Christmas in four months.

*I cleaned the house at the beginning and end of the week, sandwiched between two weekends of travel (Sisters and Seaside).

*I talked to our tax professional and found out that the $800 "stimulus" is basically a loan that we will have to repay in taxes come April.

*I cleaned out my old classroom, sorted books, categorized and labeled the new books into groups and began organizing my new third grade classroom (over the span of 3 days). I am really starting to look forward to school starting...I am okay with doing this another year!

*I found out I gained 2.6 pounds at WW and am mad because I think I have hit my first plateau. I have been hovering at the same weight for many weeks.

*Bryan and I saw a movie and I had dinner with a friend.

*I also rented a couple movies and books from the library.

*I helped out at my church for four hours during the day setting up and distributing food to needy people who came to the food pantry. Never again will I complain because I "have to" go grocery shopping- I have realized this is a priviledge and nothing makes me happier than selecting and paying for my own food.

*Shopped and packed for our camping trip...

*Ran errands and began many more projects...

I probably could have been more productive last week (maybe I am forgetting some things?) but I have come to realize I move slow. Now the pressure is on because school is starting in 3 weeks! Next summer I may have to take the whole summer off- if I can afford it! Though I was busy, I thoroughly enjoyed this time...

Are you surprised?

In the evolution of what could be a used car lot right on our own driveway, Bryan made another change in cars this week to accomodate his "need" for another Honda Civic coupe to accompany his Civic Hatchback Si. This newest car yet to be named (naming in necessary so we can keep them all straight) fell into his lap last week as the previous owner brought it into the shop and no longer wanted it. To make room, Bryan has finally decided to give up his beloved CRX (named Brie), his former race car that fell dead from a seized engine last fall and has rested in our garage since.

You may have remembered from a previous post in January how we both decided Bryan would no longer drive any black Civic coupes. However, based on the obvious similariies in the new Civic, he made an addendum to the rule: no more black 4-door civics (this one is only a 2-door). The last two black civics with four doors he has owned met their demise in previous accidents...hopefully he will be safe in this one!

From here I am not sure what the plans are...we are still waiting to sell my Accord and maybe I will get to drive the new Civic coupe. Or- one of his two will become his new race car, or he will put the needed work into the Civic coupe and flip it. Time will tell- as for now, we have five -yes, five- cars sitting outside. The CRX will be up and running this week and off to it's new home- Bryan's co-worker and fellow Wyotech alum.

Cute Pictures of Lilah

This weekend we (Mom, Dad and I) spent time in Sisters with my sister and her husband at their family vacation home. It was a nice quiet weekend just enjoying the company of each other and taking in the sights of small-town, wooded beauty. And Lilah was pretty cute too!

Crunching Numbers...

On Sunday or Monday evenings, long after Bryan has fallen asleep, I do the budgeting for the week in the office and I am occasionally lucky enough to "enjoy" the company of Fuz, who inserts himself atop my calculator and any crunchy papers/receipts that capture his attention...until he himself falls asleep.

Cute You-Tubes

I read about these in People and in the entertainment page of MSN.com last week. I think the first video of the wedding is cute and definately unique, while some may think it is cheesy. The second clip is just funny...no other reason. Except now I see Mom Jeans everywhere...:-)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4-94JhLEiN0

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lEdWVkGgUK4

Just added: I included one clip that Bryan shared with me when he got home tonight. This Civic used to be in his garage until he parted it out and gave the shell to a co-worker who recorded its ultimate demise in the video link below:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wofLC0VhWi4

What I should've said....

One of my weaknesses as a Christian (and there are many) is that I am not that great at sharing my faith with others. And when they give me reasons why they are not a Christian I say "Hmmm. Okay" and than later think about what I should've said. For example: The argument "I know people who are Christians and don't act like it and "good" people who are not Christians." To which I would respond: Christianity, unlike other religions, is not a works-based religion. Its about a personal relationship with Christ and accepting him as your savior. And any Christian who claims to be perfect obviously does not understand that we are all sinners and fall short of God, but that is why we need Jesus and the forgiveness that he gave us.

However, I am not a pushy person and especially don't want to push anybody's buttons when it comes to Christianity, especially if it pushes them in the opposite direction. However, making sure my family and friends are saved is becoming more and more important to me, and so this is my blog and I will do what I want!!! :-) For a couple years now, I have been recieving emails from a friend (Adam- married to my good friend Sarah from high school) who writes with the same purpose, though I believe he sends his emails to believes and non-believers alike...and he is much more eloquent with his thoughts.

So here is another email from Adam:

To walk away from the father, wishing him dead, only desiring the benefits of his riches and none of his relationship, is where this young man found himself. A distant land, pockets full of shameful money, multiple women, too much drink, living beyond his means, only to find himself stripped of his identity, filthy, broken, starving to the point of fighting the pigs for their slop. He tried life his way and the path he took led him to the depths, an outcast from his family and society. The most sinful of sinners; he could not sink any lower.

12"The younger of them said to his father, 'Father, give me the share of the estate that falls to me ' So he divided his wealth between them. 13"And not many days later, the younger son gathered everything together and went on a journey into a distant country, and there he squandered his estate with loose living. 14"Now when he had spent everything, a severe famine occurred in that country, and he began to be impoverished. 15"So he went and hired himself out to one of the citizens of that country, and he sent him into his fields to feed swine. 16"And he would have gladly filled his stomach with the pods that the swine were eating, and no one was giving anything to him. Luke 15:12-16

Can you relate? Maybe you have told God that you want Him out of your way, out of your life. How's that been going? You gladly take advantage of the "things" of God, His creation and all of its pleasures, but would prefer to enjoy it all without Him involved. Where will that path take you? The younger son shows us the end of that path and it's a place none of us would want to be.

So what can be done?


17"But when he came to his senses, he said, 'How many of my father's hired men have more than enough bread, but I am dying here with hunger! 18'I will get up and go to my father, and will say to him, "Father, I have sinned against heaven, and in your sight; 19I am no longer worthy to be called your son; make me as one of your hired men."' 20"So he got up and came to his father. Luke 15:17-20a


Every Christian is a lost and broken sinner who has "come to his senses" and turned back towards home with the Father. This young man was the sinner of sinners, at the bottom of the sinful pile, yet he was not too far gone to turn around; no one ever is. We can go only so far without the Father before we reach the end of ourselves and it is then that we must see our error and turn from it to head back to the Father where we belong.

Another message from Adam

Do you know you have great value? Do you know you are worth so much to God that He will pursue you until He has you safely in His gracious hands? Your value, just like mine, has nothing to do with how wonderful we are in ourselves, rather we are immensely valuable because we are God's creation, made for Him and He desires to have us with Him.

8"Or what woman, if she has ten silver coins and loses one coin, does not light a lamp and sweep the house and search carefully until she finds it? 9"When she has found it, she calls together her friends and neighbors, saying, 'Rejoice with me, for I have found the coin which I had lost!' 10"In the same way, I tell you, there is joy in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents." Luke 15:8-10



I have heard some say that "God has so many followers already, how could He possibly care whether I am with Him or not? After all, I am just a messed-up sinner who doesn't deserve Him, right?" That is so right and yet so wrong. What's right is that we are sinners who do not in any way deserve the grace and love of God. What's wrong is the conclusion, because our God is a loving and gracious God and as such we receive from Him everything we do not deserve. That's what grace is and that's the gospel message.



With nine other coins in her pocket, perhaps that tenth coin shouldn't have mattered so much to the woman in Jesus' illustration. But God sees every individual lost soul as worth going to the greatest lengths to recover. That's what the cross is, the greatest lengths of love imaginable to recover the lost; which is the gospel story of our salvation. Without Jesus you are that lost and because of Jesus you are worth finding.

Carried Home- A message from my friend Adam

You're a sheep, I'm a sheep, all of us are sheep. Stubborn (we think we know it all), prone to wander our own path no matter how risky (we don't need saving), not smart enough to find our way home on our own (vain works that attempt to bridge the gap to God), vulnerable to the attack of waiting predators (Satan really is prowling, waiting to pounce on our weakness and drag us into sin), desperate for a Shepherd (whether we know it or not, we need one). That's us, all of us, so where is our hope?

4"What man among you, if he has a hundred sheep and has lost one of them, does not leave the ninety-nine in the open pasture and go after the one which is lost until he finds it? 5"When he has found it, he lays it on his shoulders, rejoicing. 6"And when he comes home, he calls together his friends and his neighbors, saying to them, 'Rejoice with me, for I have found my sheep which was lost!' 7"I tell you that in the same way, there will be more joy in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine righteous persons who need no repentance. Luke 15:4-7


As that one that wandered away, I praise God that He came and found me, picked me up and carried me home. I am astounded that I caused a party in heaven because of the joy God has at my salvation. I, left on my own, would die away from the Shepherd Jesus and His flock, but the good news for me and for every one of us wandering sheep is that He comes looking for us. I can't find my way home. I can't even follow His rules to get back there, He has to pick me up and carry me home.

He is looking for you, His precious lost sheep. Has He found you and are you willing to be carried home? It is the only way you will get there. God's joy abounds at this, so let Him pick you up, save you, and carry you home to the waiting celebration of salvation.

Change in Perspective

I can feel myself gravitating towards the desire for the routines of school to start again. I am by no means ready to go back tomorrow (I have SOOOO much to do physically with switching grades) but I can feel my mind getting back in the game.

I think part of it is I am done with summer weather, and fall is totally my favorite season. But lately, I have also been frustrated with the crazy schedules of my jobs. I am part-time nannying and part-time tutoring for several families, and I feel like my "availability" is being taken advantage of. Parents don't show up until an hour and half after their expected time of arrival, or parents don't bring their kids to tutoring at all and decide not to tell me until 5 minutes before their e.t.a. And then once I even had a parent bring her son for tutoring when I was not expecting (I was running through the sprinkler in my swimsuit with my friend's child).

Bryan often complains that people don't take him seriously with his side jobs he does from home on cars. Often people don't show up when they say they will, and now I understand how he feels. I think I am looking forward to getting back to a fixed schedule, and I can decide how to spend my hours before or after school.

I know that everything happens for a reason and I was in such a need for a break from school I never thoguht I would say I would be ready to go back again, so I am thankful for this change in perspective. All in all, it has been a good summer but I think I will be ready to establish some "normalcy" again. Its funny how a change in perspective can alter my mood...

To You Know Who You Are

Guess WHAAAAAT! I saw this downtown tonight: "Sundries" is no longer a midwestern thing. Apparently it is urban-chic as well! I still think you are a weirdo.

Love U

One night this week Bryan came home with a bag of Sour Patch Kids (my most favorite candy in the world), a "diamond (shaped) ring (pop)," and with gummy candy, he spelled out the words "Love U M" on the desk. I thought this was very sweet of him, because though he is affectionate (which is great too), I am not used to him buying things for me (I kinda wondered if he had done something wrong?). And I thought it was more clever than a bouquet of roses or whatever. He also says he wants to make me a necklace out of car parts, which is also definately... unique...:-/. It reminds me of a time when a certain sister wore a bike chain for a bracelet (given to her by her boyfriend at the time) around her wrist...

Smile, Bryan, Smile!

I fear that Bryan is becoming less apt to smile for pictures, much like certain other men in his family. So tonight we went downtown to the Portland Waterfront, to support one of his co-workers who was playing in his band at the WakeFest, which is a wakeboarding festival along the Willamette River, that supports the children's cancer research hospital. After watching his buddy play, we went along the boardwalk to a cafe for dinner and practiced his smiling skills with the camera. Though the grand finale was a very sarcastic version of a smile, it did it for me.

With it being so hot this week, we have spent a lot of time together swimming and eating out and shopping...anything to keep cool! We also rented a couple movies and parked in front of the fans. Last night we went out to our favorite neighborhood pizzeria and then down to the track for late night drags at PIR, though no one was there! Im really not sure what is up tomorrow- there is definately yard work to be done so its a good thing its finally cooling off! I am glad to be wearing clothes other than a wet swimsuit around the house, and I look forward to using my kitchen again!